I feel like I have been living in a new invisible bubble. Three weeks ago I was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), from that came the words insulin resistant, pre-diabetes, medication, more exercise, new diet, decrease infertility problems. Honestly, my head was spinning. All I can say is my life has half turned upside down because I have been here before. I am saddened by this news because it is another limitation to my life. During this time people around me have come out of the woodwork's saying they have PCOS too which makes me feel less alone. BUT at the same time it makes me feel worse, like somehow that what I am feeling is not justified because so many people are already fighting this illness. The only good thing about PCOS is now I know why I have acne, something that has lowered my self-esteem over the last few months. Being diagnosed with PCOS also explains other symptoms like random facial hair and painful ovaries.
The day I found out was the day before my four year anniversary with my partner and I found it quite hard to tell him about the fact if we plan to have children in the very very distant future, there COULD be some issues. Although that's the worst possible scenario and we are not going to worry about it until the time comes, it is still something that has been brought to my attention and it does scare me.
The first week was the hardest. I told my closest family and friends first because I wanted them to know that I needed the support. I didn't go anywhere except uni because I wanted to stay home and hide out. I researched diets and went to my GP about medication. I rang other family members to let them know about it. I was also very angry about the fact that I cannot eat my favourite foods anymore and that life decided to throw my another curve ball. I also was just in shock.
After a week of keeping strong, I finally broke down in tears to my partner, which felt good because I was so hyped up on all the information I forgot how to feel. What I have to keep reminding myself is that I am allowed to grieve, in fact it is something that I often preach. I think it is easy to get lost in information, doctors and family and friends opinions, but at the end of the day it is me that has to deal with my health. It is me that needs to be strong. it is me that has to do what is best for me. But every now and then I would like some people to remind me that I am stronger than this, especially when I am having a low day, like today.
Felicity.F
The day I found out was the day before my four year anniversary with my partner and I found it quite hard to tell him about the fact if we plan to have children in the very very distant future, there COULD be some issues. Although that's the worst possible scenario and we are not going to worry about it until the time comes, it is still something that has been brought to my attention and it does scare me.
The first week was the hardest. I told my closest family and friends first because I wanted them to know that I needed the support. I didn't go anywhere except uni because I wanted to stay home and hide out. I researched diets and went to my GP about medication. I rang other family members to let them know about it. I was also very angry about the fact that I cannot eat my favourite foods anymore and that life decided to throw my another curve ball. I also was just in shock.
After a week of keeping strong, I finally broke down in tears to my partner, which felt good because I was so hyped up on all the information I forgot how to feel. What I have to keep reminding myself is that I am allowed to grieve, in fact it is something that I often preach. I think it is easy to get lost in information, doctors and family and friends opinions, but at the end of the day it is me that has to deal with my health. It is me that needs to be strong. it is me that has to do what is best for me. But every now and then I would like some people to remind me that I am stronger than this, especially when I am having a low day, like today.
Felicity.F